Photos a gift from the Lord by a gifted photographer in Chandler~
Yuvaraj Family...
A blending of two worlds...then there were 3-
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Monday, March 22, 2010
Dreaming of returning to the sound of His call...March 2nd week
Paul's shouts in Tamil help keep baby half awake as I lazily attempt his night's last feeding....it seems my great scheduling efforts have all been in vain! Baby still thinks he's starving every two hours......and I jump at his waking call-such a wimp. "Isaiah has my wife well trained" Paul says! Daddy calls it "acting"...Mommy says, "he's hungry!"
It's nearly 1 am. and I haven't taken the naps with baby that I read are advantageous.
Amma (mother in Tamil) struggles to understand Paul through his old cell phone barely operating--but our life line keeping our world's connected. The speaker phone sends rickshaw bells from the road-side right to our condo here in Phoenix sending me back to Sastri Nagar as if we never left.
But we have. Paul and I have been on this journey away from our India for nearly a year studying, learning together, joining a mission agency that helps support the work of nationals in their native country, applying for his citizenship and having our first child.
I can only imagine all of the Lord's purposes for us, our marriage, our ministry in this precious time. I think of what it will all mean later for our Isaiah...being born American, where his heart will be later in life, how the Father will call and lead him.
It's been invaluable.
My husband now understands my jokes!! Sarcasm is becoming a subtle skill of his and that to me is more precious than I can even describe as our fist year of marriage in Chennai--before Paul had ever left the East lacked any kind of fellowship with humor. A heart's desire now fulfilled--as a marriage without humor is not a haven for this American girl.
He now will understand the thousand things I miss and fail to say in India in a day....from carpet, to yogurt to hugs, laughter out loud and useless, silly constant texting from family members who know you all too well. Paul has also developed a great understanding of Americans.....what they're walking through over here, the pain of broken families, the hard work behind a well earned dollar, how great and differently they love and show it.
For him to have his own friendships now with the people in my life who's photos sit in the pages of my Bible Bible in India is priceless. He knows the precious ones in my life holding us up before the throne....that means so much to his wife!
this is all a gift---I never even asked my Father for...but He's lavished this new understanding on both of us--the knowledge of our family's, our backgrounds, our cultures and comforts. I am truly thankful. Our first year as rich as it was being married lacked a certain grounding He is now giving in a deeper knowledge of one another, creating fun in friendship. We had the passion, we had the rare fellowship where we challenged and spired the faith of one another--but our friendship needed to grow as He opened the way to more understanding. I am thankful for the unique quality of a teachable spirit in my fearless leader, along with his servant's heart--I rarely see that in pastors, especially in the East.
My little sister, Michelle (or Belle) was here today before rushing into ICU where she lives practically as a night trauma nurse. Our current home is just down a block from her hospital making her visits convenient, My great highlight! She brings her crazy stories making me laugh so hard I tear up, her questions about her future, her un-ending support and love for baby, Paul and me. Her birthday is the 19th. Paul and I are excited to host her little family dinner here, listen to more stories from Haiti, just be together.
My older brother, Matthew is just 5 minutes away south of us. Paul picks him up on Tuesdays for men's Bible studies.....we share a bite when he has time, he comes in like a storm grants his approval, we laugh as he taunts me relentlessly ..... I have to treasure these moments... we never know what the Lord will do. We recall Paul's visa denials three times in a row--where the way just did not open up for his visit to the sates before marriage to come and learn and slowly He is opening the way and making sense of our timeline. I can not take a moment for granted.
These have become the sweetest parts of my time here. Moments with the ones we love. Exchanges with family and friends that believe in us, that know what Paul and I are living for. That understand how badly we want to be effective for His Kingdom. How at times our days haven't made sense here, but we realize we're on the path to be poured out for Him and look for it.
Daniel, his most loyal of disciples grabs the cell from Amma.....they are carrying up loads of bricks up the stairs balanced on their heads. As our parents oversee the project from the terrace insuring only the best mortar is used. Daniel takes a break reminding Paul of his duty this summer to help him hunt for his bride.....the boys start heckling him and we end our phone call.
Hitting our knees together before drifting off with baby....it's so clear Jehovah's hand as been on every part of our journey here. We can't wait to be back in the rich harvest He's called us to. Lord, purify us that we may be Jesus to the ones who have yet to hear! Knowing our guest house is being prepared for our mission compels us to greater faithfulness. It's all, only for you, our Lord of Glory!
We long to see you honored in our land.
Prepare us!
Quicken us!
May we only delight in Your Word!
Remain in You and bear much fruit!
The very purpose of our union on this earth
that YOU will be seen and adored because
of our obedience.
That we will decrease as YOUR Kingdom Comes!
That all may know that YOU alone are the Christ,
the Son of the living God! And coming soon to
judge the world in sin and righteousness.
May we be without shame on that great day.
Let us be poured out unto You, our precious Lord
and Christ.....for You alone are our life.
It's nearly 1 am. and I haven't taken the naps with baby that I read are advantageous.
Amma (mother in Tamil) struggles to understand Paul through his old cell phone barely operating--but our life line keeping our world's connected. The speaker phone sends rickshaw bells from the road-side right to our condo here in Phoenix sending me back to Sastri Nagar as if we never left.
But we have. Paul and I have been on this journey away from our India for nearly a year studying, learning together, joining a mission agency that helps support the work of nationals in their native country, applying for his citizenship and having our first child.
I can only imagine all of the Lord's purposes for us, our marriage, our ministry in this precious time. I think of what it will all mean later for our Isaiah...being born American, where his heart will be later in life, how the Father will call and lead him.
It's been invaluable.
My husband now understands my jokes!! Sarcasm is becoming a subtle skill of his and that to me is more precious than I can even describe as our fist year of marriage in Chennai--before Paul had ever left the East lacked any kind of fellowship with humor. A heart's desire now fulfilled--as a marriage without humor is not a haven for this American girl.
He now will understand the thousand things I miss and fail to say in India in a day....from carpet, to yogurt to hugs, laughter out loud and useless, silly constant texting from family members who know you all too well. Paul has also developed a great understanding of Americans.....what they're walking through over here, the pain of broken families, the hard work behind a well earned dollar, how great and differently they love and show it.
For him to have his own friendships now with the people in my life who's photos sit in the pages of my Bible Bible in India is priceless. He knows the precious ones in my life holding us up before the throne....that means so much to his wife!
this is all a gift---I never even asked my Father for...but He's lavished this new understanding on both of us--the knowledge of our family's, our backgrounds, our cultures and comforts. I am truly thankful. Our first year as rich as it was being married lacked a certain grounding He is now giving in a deeper knowledge of one another, creating fun in friendship. We had the passion, we had the rare fellowship where we challenged and spired the faith of one another--but our friendship needed to grow as He opened the way to more understanding. I am thankful for the unique quality of a teachable spirit in my fearless leader, along with his servant's heart--I rarely see that in pastors, especially in the East.
My little sister, Michelle (or Belle) was here today before rushing into ICU where she lives practically as a night trauma nurse. Our current home is just down a block from her hospital making her visits convenient, My great highlight! She brings her crazy stories making me laugh so hard I tear up, her questions about her future, her un-ending support and love for baby, Paul and me. Her birthday is the 19th. Paul and I are excited to host her little family dinner here, listen to more stories from Haiti, just be together.
My older brother, Matthew is just 5 minutes away south of us. Paul picks him up on Tuesdays for men's Bible studies.....we share a bite when he has time, he comes in like a storm grants his approval, we laugh as he taunts me relentlessly ..... I have to treasure these moments... we never know what the Lord will do. We recall Paul's visa denials three times in a row--where the way just did not open up for his visit to the sates before marriage to come and learn and slowly He is opening the way and making sense of our timeline. I can not take a moment for granted.
These have become the sweetest parts of my time here. Moments with the ones we love. Exchanges with family and friends that believe in us, that know what Paul and I are living for. That understand how badly we want to be effective for His Kingdom. How at times our days haven't made sense here, but we realize we're on the path to be poured out for Him and look for it.
Daniel, his most loyal of disciples grabs the cell from Amma.....they are carrying up loads of bricks up the stairs balanced on their heads. As our parents oversee the project from the terrace insuring only the best mortar is used. Daniel takes a break reminding Paul of his duty this summer to help him hunt for his bride.....the boys start heckling him and we end our phone call.
Hitting our knees together before drifting off with baby....it's so clear Jehovah's hand as been on every part of our journey here. We can't wait to be back in the rich harvest He's called us to. Lord, purify us that we may be Jesus to the ones who have yet to hear! Knowing our guest house is being prepared for our mission compels us to greater faithfulness. It's all, only for you, our Lord of Glory!
We long to see you honored in our land.
Prepare us!
Quicken us!
May we only delight in Your Word!
Remain in You and bear much fruit!
The very purpose of our union on this earth
that YOU will be seen and adored because
of our obedience.
That we will decrease as YOUR Kingdom Comes!
That all may know that YOU alone are the Christ,
the Son of the living God! And coming soon to
judge the world in sin and righteousness.
May we be without shame on that great day.
Let us be poured out unto You, our precious Lord
and Christ.....for You alone are our life.
Monday, March 1, 2010
February special
Little one is here!! In our arms, at last.
I am becoming the kind of mom I never thought I would be! The absolute spoiler...not able to bear it when he cries, hardly putting him down, feeding
baby at his every whim.....this madness has got to stop! I am going to make things
impossible for service back in India as babe is learning to be the boss! :)
He sleeps looking like an angel now and a thousand things I have to do, (and finally can!), run through my mind as he makes his little sweet sighs.....My great battle--
do I rest when baby does or finally tackle my list that's been growing since before labor began!
Paul is now at my brother, Matt's place down the road doing our wash. I have been reveling in God's grace over us, giving us our condo and space just in the nick of time! The church bells ringing in the distance just down Central Ave along with the palm branches waving in my bedroom window have been special extras of His grace as I have laid in bed healing, waiting on Him, loving my baby the last 3 weeks.
It's all been a whirl-wind of a culture shock for my man---in who's culture
Mom and dad and siblings take over and share all your duties with new baby. Usually you move back in with parents. Here in the West the Daddy's are the Hero! If you are so lucky. Paul has jumped in head first with no turning back.....not a complain from my man who sets up his little man caves with baby to give mom a little sleep in the wee hours. They are very content and pleased with each other.
The Love Factor that enthralls us, that keeps us captivated by every little sound and grimace is God's great weapon of choice connecting us to the constant care of our offspring! "Oh, what a face, look at you, little lover....." Oh, I know, Honey, he is so precious.....wait--IS THAT CLOCK OFF ??? Is it really 2:45 am.??!"
True Event! Without this great love effect that sweeps in and literally takes your life by storm--I don't think our babies would get the tender loving care they need to grow and thrive into loving adults with hearts after God and givers in society!
The greatest responsibility ever handed down to Paul and I should terrify us--molding the very view of God for the life of our baby boy.....but rather there is a holy fear, a recognition of our complete and utter dependence on God just like in all other areas of life and a quiet excitement that just sort of bubbles beneath the surface when considering God gave this duty to us!! To us sinful people, to shape our child's faith and prepare Him to reign with Christ in eternity.
This is awe awakening.
We are just only setting our toes in the water....discovering what parenting is.
The gift, the work, the joy, the heart aches...so much ahead.
We are in for the long-hall.
Lord, awaken in us the pure desire to know YOU!
To be among the ones who See You in all--who are true
worshipers in spirit and in truth
through all tasks and silent breaks between the cries and the diaper changes.
Awaken, Lord of Hosts--an unquenchable thirst for Your Word!
Ripen our hearts with greater hunger for You.
Purge away from me, Father every carnal desire and gravity towards
the world--for friendship therein is death--is the enemy of You.
May I be one Spirit with You, my Lord!
Jehovah--You are altogether Worthy and True and GLorious!
I confess that YOU alone are Lord and beside You there is no
other--on earth or in heaven above.
let us be the ones who adore Your Name above food and drink
and all. Even my Lord, above this sweetest adoration you've
filled our hearts with in granting this first fruit.
May we cherish Your Name most, may the role that You have
given us only propel us on the truest devotion we have
ever known.
Purify my heart, oh Lord and remove all that
is filth and self-serving, all that would lust for comforts
and ease, and independence and privacy.
Purge away this dross that will keep my son from seeing Your
True Self.
This is the cry of my heart.....that just as Paul, my
covering in this life was lead to Your heart through
the purity and righteousness of his mother--may my honest
walk before YOU in our home, in our church, in our public
life awaken in Isaiah sincere longings for YOU.
May my love and devotion to YOUR Word first cause our boy to be
a man who keeps his word, who protects the poor, who
fights for truth, for justice, who seeks YOUR face above
all other pursuits in life.
May our Love for one another, for the Gospel, give Isaiah
William a love for both our countries, a passion for the lost
and a fire in his heart to handle the sword valiantly as
an Advocate of Your honor and Kingdom wherever the soles of his
feet shall tread.
Thank you for this blessed life. May we be faithful, Holy
Father. May we be quick to catch each other, to walk in the
spirit in the secret places, to abide with You in every corner
of our minds.
May You alone have the preeminence.
In Jesus' Name
Amen
I am becoming the kind of mom I never thought I would be! The absolute spoiler...not able to bear it when he cries, hardly putting him down, feeding
baby at his every whim.....this madness has got to stop! I am going to make things
impossible for service back in India as babe is learning to be the boss! :)
He sleeps looking like an angel now and a thousand things I have to do, (and finally can!), run through my mind as he makes his little sweet sighs.....My great battle--
do I rest when baby does or finally tackle my list that's been growing since before labor began!
Paul is now at my brother, Matt's place down the road doing our wash. I have been reveling in God's grace over us, giving us our condo and space just in the nick of time! The church bells ringing in the distance just down Central Ave along with the palm branches waving in my bedroom window have been special extras of His grace as I have laid in bed healing, waiting on Him, loving my baby the last 3 weeks.
It's all been a whirl-wind of a culture shock for my man---in who's culture
Mom and dad and siblings take over and share all your duties with new baby. Usually you move back in with parents. Here in the West the Daddy's are the Hero! If you are so lucky. Paul has jumped in head first with no turning back.....not a complain from my man who sets up his little man caves with baby to give mom a little sleep in the wee hours. They are very content and pleased with each other.
The Love Factor that enthralls us, that keeps us captivated by every little sound and grimace is God's great weapon of choice connecting us to the constant care of our offspring! "Oh, what a face, look at you, little lover....." Oh, I know, Honey, he is so precious.....wait--IS THAT CLOCK OFF ??? Is it really 2:45 am.??!"
True Event! Without this great love effect that sweeps in and literally takes your life by storm--I don't think our babies would get the tender loving care they need to grow and thrive into loving adults with hearts after God and givers in society!
The greatest responsibility ever handed down to Paul and I should terrify us--molding the very view of God for the life of our baby boy.....but rather there is a holy fear, a recognition of our complete and utter dependence on God just like in all other areas of life and a quiet excitement that just sort of bubbles beneath the surface when considering God gave this duty to us!! To us sinful people, to shape our child's faith and prepare Him to reign with Christ in eternity.
This is awe awakening.
We are just only setting our toes in the water....discovering what parenting is.
The gift, the work, the joy, the heart aches...so much ahead.
We are in for the long-hall.
Lord, awaken in us the pure desire to know YOU!
To be among the ones who See You in all--who are true
worshipers in spirit and in truth
through all tasks and silent breaks between the cries and the diaper changes.
Awaken, Lord of Hosts--an unquenchable thirst for Your Word!
Ripen our hearts with greater hunger for You.
Purge away from me, Father every carnal desire and gravity towards
the world--for friendship therein is death--is the enemy of You.
May I be one Spirit with You, my Lord!
Jehovah--You are altogether Worthy and True and GLorious!
I confess that YOU alone are Lord and beside You there is no
other--on earth or in heaven above.
let us be the ones who adore Your Name above food and drink
and all. Even my Lord, above this sweetest adoration you've
filled our hearts with in granting this first fruit.
May we cherish Your Name most, may the role that You have
given us only propel us on the truest devotion we have
ever known.
Purify my heart, oh Lord and remove all that
is filth and self-serving, all that would lust for comforts
and ease, and independence and privacy.
Purge away this dross that will keep my son from seeing Your
True Self.
This is the cry of my heart.....that just as Paul, my
covering in this life was lead to Your heart through
the purity and righteousness of his mother--may my honest
walk before YOU in our home, in our church, in our public
life awaken in Isaiah sincere longings for YOU.
May my love and devotion to YOUR Word first cause our boy to be
a man who keeps his word, who protects the poor, who
fights for truth, for justice, who seeks YOUR face above
all other pursuits in life.
May our Love for one another, for the Gospel, give Isaiah
William a love for both our countries, a passion for the lost
and a fire in his heart to handle the sword valiantly as
an Advocate of Your honor and Kingdom wherever the soles of his
feet shall tread.
Thank you for this blessed life. May we be faithful, Holy
Father. May we be quick to catch each other, to walk in the
spirit in the secret places, to abide with You in every corner
of our minds.
May You alone have the preeminence.
In Jesus' Name
Amen
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